Hello again blog.
As usual, not much excitement happening. I've finally gotten my riches from Blue Cross, and the situation with the girl I was seeing indeed went south.
She didn't even bother to return an e-mail I sent her (which wasn't antagonistic, it was actually a reply to prior e-mail sent to me). Maybe she saw the blog-ish entries on my dating profile - ones where I implied the wasting of my time, and being led on (2 things I hate). Maybe not. I simply think she was too much of a coward to simply tell me she wasn't interested, and liked my attention (it probably boosted her self-esteem). In any case, I'm not surprised. It's kind of par for the course.
I used to think that all the "good ones" were taken. Now, I'm thinking that there were never any "good ones" to begin with.
Which brings me to my next...erm..."issue".
I've been wrestling with some feelings I'd rather not be. I've reached the point where I'm starting to feel absolutely bitter. Consistently so. Normally, I go through little periods of it, and eventually it passes. Now, I'm feeling it all the time. It's the kind of bitterness that makes me want to kick people's teeth in whenever I see them smiling, or happy. It's like the twist of an invisible knife in my heart when I see people holding hands, or walking their babies by in strollers. I'd murder the world to feel that amorphous, yet integral, thing. But I'm apparently not allowed to. I don't know why.
It's been very hard to keep the happy face on in front of anyone I know. But I'm known for being the smiling, silly goofball. So I guess this is all just "tears of a clown", or something. Me playing my role helps others get through their day. Or not. I don't even know anymore.
I've been hearing these 2 songs over the intercom at work. They've been poking at me for the last few weeks, and this afternoon, I finally sat down and figured out who did them.
It's nice to hear some actual "good music" (which is subjective, I suppose) out there for a change. Very sick of everything seeming to be Katy Perry, or Lady Gaga (both, whom I despise with the burning passion of a 1000 suns). Justin Hines is exceptional. Inspirational, even. In any case, I find both songs very moving.
Take a look.
The Band Perry - If I Die Young
Justin Hines - Tell Me I'm Wrong
Saturday, October 29, 2011
Friday, October 21, 2011
With-ah Teeth-ah!
Hello again, Blog. How's Bloggyness treating you?
Not too much exciting things happening here. Here's the skinny.
-Been quasi-dating a cute, horribly issue-ridden girl. A bulimic, obsessive-compulsive (with excercise, possibly other things), into-the-cutting, girl...who likes to have friends-with-benefits. She also can't be bothered to give me time on her busy schedule. I only seem to get time when people cancel time with her. Also, she blew me off the other night, claiming she was heading home to nap, then texted me that she was out speed-skating. I guess that makes her kind of dumb, too. I don't think this'll last much longer.
-I've been wrestling with Alberta Blue Cross for the last few months. Apparently, the system in place doesn't update your information when it gets entered into it, should you be giving personal information to...say, a dentist office. Meaning that you have to contact them, and change all your personal info on their end.
Seems counter-intuitive. I bring it up because I've been waiting for reimbursement from my coverage, which is apparently going to an address I haven't lived at for almost a decade. All because the system doesn't acknowledge that newer information might be more reliable than what's on file. Now imagine that you've spent over $2000 out-of-pocket, waiting for reimbursement that isn't getting to you. Hulk is mad...and broke, waiting for my 85% coverage to get back to me.
I've called Blue Cross, twice now, to fix things. Hopefully, the riches will get to me in the next week or 2.
-I've been having peculiar dreams, and I think they're prophetic. Stuff I'm dreaming is coming to pass.
-On another weird note, R & J have been kicking around baby names, and for the last few weeks I've had a name stuck in my head.
"Lily".
I was meaning to suggest it, and just the other day, J confided that it's likely the name they're going with.
That might not sound too weird, but combine it with the fact that I also knew J was pregnant before anyone else did (even her), and knew it was going to be a girl...
Very, very odd.
Not too much exciting things happening here. Here's the skinny.
-Been quasi-dating a cute, horribly issue-ridden girl. A bulimic, obsessive-compulsive (with excercise, possibly other things), into-the-cutting, girl...who likes to have friends-with-benefits. She also can't be bothered to give me time on her busy schedule. I only seem to get time when people cancel time with her. Also, she blew me off the other night, claiming she was heading home to nap, then texted me that she was out speed-skating. I guess that makes her kind of dumb, too. I don't think this'll last much longer.
-I've been wrestling with Alberta Blue Cross for the last few months. Apparently, the system in place doesn't update your information when it gets entered into it, should you be giving personal information to...say, a dentist office. Meaning that you have to contact them, and change all your personal info on their end.
Seems counter-intuitive. I bring it up because I've been waiting for reimbursement from my coverage, which is apparently going to an address I haven't lived at for almost a decade. All because the system doesn't acknowledge that newer information might be more reliable than what's on file. Now imagine that you've spent over $2000 out-of-pocket, waiting for reimbursement that isn't getting to you. Hulk is mad...and broke, waiting for my 85% coverage to get back to me.
I've called Blue Cross, twice now, to fix things. Hopefully, the riches will get to me in the next week or 2.
-I've been having peculiar dreams, and I think they're prophetic. Stuff I'm dreaming is coming to pass.
-On another weird note, R & J have been kicking around baby names, and for the last few weeks I've had a name stuck in my head.
"Lily".
I was meaning to suggest it, and just the other day, J confided that it's likely the name they're going with.
That might not sound too weird, but combine it with the fact that I also knew J was pregnant before anyone else did (even her), and knew it was going to be a girl...
Very, very odd.
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